Topic > God's Teaching on Marriages and Its Impact on the Divorce Rate in the United States

Table of ContentsAbstractIntroductionContextPurposeProblem StatementMeaning of the ProblemLiterature ReviewCommunication; motherhood and parenthood; religion and spirituality; Religion and Spirituality Historical Data Questions and Answers Describe different purposes that a literature review can serve when planning a research project. What is known about this research on marriage? What is not known about my marital happiness? Why is it important be exposed to what do we not know about God's presence in marriage?MethodologyMethodology section:Chosen methodologyData analysisDesignSelection methodInterview processParticipantsJoel & Keyla CowanEmily & GeorgeMercy &TrapWilfred & JoanMo & MessyJob and ChristyResearch projectSummary/Conclusion/RecommendationsSummaryWorkCommunicationReligious and spiritualityMarriage crisis and divorce rate Limitation of researchFuture studyConclusionReference pageAbstractThis research is based solely on the essentials of marriage. What most couples describe as a wonderful marriage from a faith perspective. Although not much research has been conducted in this area due to the confidentiality of marital information, our participants were freely given the option to opt out whenever they felt threatened or uncomfortable disclosing their personal and complex information. We strictly required that our participants have a few years of marital experience, including perpetrators of divorce in the research. Participants were also asked to fill out a questionnaire describing their idea of ​​a “wonderful wedding.” We attempted to interview 12 couples in this study. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an original essayThe second phase of the interview was scheduled based on the answers to the questionnaire. Couples who responded well to the questionnaires were invited to the second phase of the interview. We conducted a self-report with open-ended questions that allow interviewers to express themselves fully. We used all concluded findings to reschedule further interviews and research. Introduction Marriage and divorce have immense meaning not only for me, but also for families who vacillate between notions of healthy marriage and the curious disease of divorce. In America, marriage, as most of us perceive it, is just another bizarre twist in the absence of love, and yet, what is the love we so desperately and eagerly seek? It's a feeling: "... are we really in love, or is it the longing lust of our flesh?" I marvel at myself as I think about my love, it lights me up, it leaves me perplexed, it warms my insides by shaking it and at the same time tightens me and makes my heart implacable. The same love brings joy and sadness, health and illness, laughter and agony, conscience and oblivion; so, what is love and what is its place in marriage and God's teachings? Divorce has destroyed most of us, separating families, sending our loved ones into the eternal darkness of darkness. Divorce struggles are real, very important, proven by statistical analysis of the annual divorce rate in America, leaving most families with total sadness and conundrum. For most people, communication problems are the leading cause of divorce in the United States, while for others; it is misunderstanding and lack of mutual affection towards spouses. In this research, I want to describe how communication problems lead to mostseparations, its merits and demerits, and the impact of God's teachings on marriage as a whole. BackgroundAs war causes more pain to the innocent than to the perpetrators, so does divorce to children involved. It goes without saying, but children lack the coping mechanism that we adults have, so a simple divorce represents a life-threatening impact on most children. This can subsequently lead to severe tremors and anger in the lives of children even in the later stages of their adulthood if not properly cared for and managed. The scenes are deeply recorded and ingrained in their hearts, and as the Bible teaches: “Above all, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it” (Proverbs 4:23). Purpose The Bible vividly outlines the basic principles of marriage. “Be completely humble and gentle, be patient, bearing with one another in love” (Ephesians 4:2-3); How do these teachings impact our broken marriages? The purpose of this study is to analyze God's teachings on marriage and how they integrate with communication problems in most marriages. My research objectives will seek to empirically answer these questions: How much chaos do communication problems cause in marriages? What effect do communication problems in marriage have on children? Does divorce have a psychological effect on all family members? What is God's Purpose in Marriage As arbitrary as it may seem, "married people age 50 and older have skyrocketed since the 1990s, in 2015, for every 1,000 married people age 50 and older years, ... 10 divorced five as of 1990 according to the National Health Statistics Center" ...Alas, the divorce rate among people under 50 is about double that of adults 50 and older years” Stepler (2017). These shocking statistics have indeed forced serious outrage among various members of the divorced family, leaving them speechless with unfathomable indignation. This contagious continuous agony is mistakenly judged by many couples as a mere phantom, albeit overbearing and irritating, yet it is accepted with the sweetness of mutual respect. , although suicidal with great chains of drunkenness, is nevertheless recognized with tranquility. That's the word on marriage as we speak, the web that entangles most of us. Just as war hurts the innocent rather than the guilty, so divorce hurts the children involved. Children do not have the coping mechanisms that we adults have and are the ones who are hurt the most in a divorce. This can later lead to severe tremors and anger in later adult life. Divorce scenes are deeply ingrained in them, and as the Bible notes, “Above all else guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it” (Proverbs 4:23). Most people consider communication problems as the main cause of divorce in them. United States, while for others it is misunderstanding and lack of mutual affection towards spouses. In this research, I want to describe how communication problems lead to most separations, its merits and demerits, and the impact of God's teachings on marriage as a whole. The Bible vividly outlines the basic principles of marriage. “Be completely humble and gentle, be patient, bearing with one another in love” (Ephesians 4:2-3); How do these teachings impact our broken marriages? In summary, this study analyzes God's teachings on marriage and how it integrates with communication issues in most marriages. My research objectives will attempt to answerempirically to these questions: How much chaos do communication problems cause in marriages? What effect do communication problems in marriage have on children? Does divorce have a psychological effect on all family members? What is God's purpose in marriage? Marriage has lost the sacredness of what it was. Marriage values ​​and piety continue to deteriorate with “traditional values ​​of love, fidelity, commitment and obligation are no longer respected” Sanchez (1999); a notion contrary to the biblical teaching of marital piety. This research should help us reach a consensus and fully understand the hidden meaning of marriage in biblical teachings. Brainstorm how to complete the project. Did you overlook something? Yes, I did, and it is the most essential part of this research which involves: research scope, hypotheses and research objectives. I intend to use the acronym SMART for my scope and goals; which must be specific to my research topic, with measurable objectives and results within the established time frame. I also overlooked the risks of research, such as being out of scope, misuse of resources, and research procrastination. Strategyhow to improve each project: My research strategy simply focuses on my strengths while minimizing my weaknesses and exploring my opportunities. Specifically, my main areas of interest include: Exploring the latest strategies for data collection Modifying my results consistently throughout the duration of my project Staying within my scope (always measuring my progress) Using primary and secondary methods of data collection. Always improving strategy with amount of work involved and my goal is to use my research tasks efficiently. Importance of the problem Divorce breaks millions of people every day. Millions of children continue to grow up with single parents who hinder their performance on a broader spectrum. Additionally, following divorce, parents and children continue to struggle with overall communication with each other, lacking problem-solving skills. Finally, with the eradication of Christian education in most schools, most of us continue to struggle to understand the true meaning of God's teachings on the essential meaning of marriage. This has caused serious problems especially for interfaith and interfaith couples. Children only know what they have learned from their parents. Literature Review Literature review is essential to give us the depth and breadth of study already undertaken in this field of research. The review gives us the opportunity to analyze our research data and provide vivid suggestions on what holistically constitutes a good marriage demonstrated by the presence of Almighty God. With variables such as communication, testimonies, symposium archives, and both religious and spiritual outcomes, these become the primary focus of our study and analysis of this research. The research and various interviews that support this work are covered in this section. Communication; motherhood and parenthood; religion and spirituality; Scholars believe that communication is the foundation that holds the family together. Bellah et al., 1985; Fowers, 1993), specifically argues that “communication is the primary means of ensuring happiness” and this is why a happy marriage is linked to happy communication. When the couple communicates, they tend to focus more on their intimacy, personality and emotions. Many notions have emerged about how men and women communicate. In fact, men and women communicate differently and failure to understand these fundamental principles hasleft many couples and families heartbroken. Communication is what affects the core of every marriage. This is how both spouses show love and affection for each other. It is also in communication that we bring out the demon within us, when not adequately tamed. “…Communication methods and marital satisfaction are symbiosis. “The perception that husband and wife have of their marital communication is very critical to the progress or deterioration of the marital relationship” (Satir, 1964). Moffit, in his research, also found that “emotionally healthier wives tended to be more communicative and did not complain. Emotionally healthier husbands tended to minimize problems and communicate quite well with their wives” Moffit et al. (1986). Wives may have higher expectations of openness and sharing in the relationship, as well as different attitudes about intimacy and self-disclosure. “…for women, the emotional quality of marriage is crucial to their role within the family. For men, married status may be more important than the emotional quality of the relationship” Style (1983). Based on these reports we incorporated the following question about communication into the interview question: (1. What is the nature of communication between spouses? 2. How do both couples view their communication? 3. What are some of the common differences with their communication models) these are some of the questions that will be answered in this research. During the interview one couple expressed the most difficult situation they faced with communication. It was intriguing to discover that the main source of this misunderstanding was actually work-related. After interviewing various coupes, what struck me the most was what Jennifer and Manish described regarding their main cause of chaos and misunderstanding. According to Manish “work stress was the main cause of misunderstandings”. Even though they professed the same faith, work stress was a serious thorn in their marriage. As a developer, every day is stressful for Manish. From missed deployments to screaming product owners, having just one quiet day is a blessing and something Manish could hardly have imagined. Then, as a father, Manish had to transform himself and be the most loving father to their four-year-old son (Joshua), who is not yet able to understand work stress. Apart from all this, Manish is also expected to be the best loving husband at home. Sometimes, the smallest unnecessary problem turns him off. Manish believed that he could be the best husband and father if he could just lose his job for at least a month. Manish's idea was in no way different from what his wife Jennifer professed. For Jennifer, who is a full-time nurse in the intensive care unit, working with moaning and end-of-life patients leaves her speechless after every shift. He always comes home late and sometimes doesn't even take a lunch break. For her, “12 hours of work” is more than enough, and expecting her to be a sweet, loving mother and loving wife was way out of her league. In short, in most cases, he was unable to manage work and family life. This has caused more than enough stress in their marriage and something they are seriously struggling with. One thing both couples (Manish and Jennifer) agree on is the idea of ​​sharing their burdens and being able to pray for each other. This has been their lifeline and the source of their courage in most cases. Both are able to put their problems aside, take a walk or simply devote part of their energy to prayer, and that is the only reasonso they both believe they saved their marriage. The problems they faced are impacting millions of other marriages. Voydanoff (1988) found that “an increase in hours spent in the workforce is related to higher levels of work/family conflict.” (191). White and Keith (1990) found that shift work is the most difficult in the marital and family system. They state that “18 shift work has a negative effect on marital quality across a variety of dimensions.” (191).Religion and SpiritualityIt is evident that Manish and Jennifer valued their spiritual bonds. He was their anchor especially in times of need and evidently we can see the same happening in various accounts. Anthony noted that “religious orientation refers to how one relates religion to one's life and how one is motivated by one's religion.” A notion supported by Giblin who argued that "... the spiritual dimension of the human as a unifying force that integrates all other dimensions, plays a vital role in well-being and identifies what is meaningful and purposeful" (Giblin, 1996). Furthermore, I was shocked by Johnson's findings that religion neither increases nor decreases the divorce rate. “Although religiosity may decrease the likelihood of divorce; it does not increase marital satisfaction or decrease marital conflict” (Booth & Johnson, 1985), in contrast, other scholars believe that religion has everything to do with whether couples stay married and are committed to their families. “Religion can and does influence marital commitment and family social support systems.” Additionally, church members support, encourage, and care for each other, providing the support system most families need. Pamela noted in the interview that, “I have been able to stay engaged with my husband Bruce because of the church support system (WEAG CHURCH). In 2014, my husband Bruce was drafted into Iraq and it was impossible to stay here alone with our three children, reminiscing and scared of the unknown. The fear of something sudden happening was unbearable, but WEAG gave me hope. They supported me, consoled me and prayed with me. They have become my closest family and because of this my marriage has been saved…” Hence, attending religious services, taking part in church social activities and praying together can enhance the couple's interaction in a supportive environment. The chronology of historical data helps support the importance of marriage and the Christian faith in families. Although some families have managed to thrive in their marriage without incorporating God into them, many people still believe in the supernatural power of the Holy Spirit and God's purpose for marriage. From economic, social, psychological to sociological, romance and marriage go back a long way. They come from eternity and have enriched the notions that we hold dear. The story helps us find the real distorted meaning of marriage which differs greatly from the concept of personal fulfillment. Questions and Answers Describe several purposes that a literature review can serve when planning a research project. Academic review provides us with insights and a deeper understanding of our current work or project. I also provide us with the depth of how much previous work has been conducted in the same field of study. Academic review helps us understand research strengths (findings), weaknesses, opportunities for further study, and future expectations. What is known about this research on marriage? Everyone else tries to marry for love.Some people find self-fulfillment knowing they are in love with someone else. Others marry for stability. “I want to have children. Marriage provides – in theory – the most stable environment in which to raise children.” Other obvious reasons include financial goals, finding a stable partner, sexual fulfillment, family pressures and religious goals. What is not known about the happiness of my marriage? There is no single point or single method to a happy marriage. People around the world have relied on many notions of what constitutes a happy marriage, but most of the ubiquitous notions have most often failed. Financially stable people (even if people consider income to be the main source of a happy marriage) have divorced and chosen to go their separate ways. Most people have naively ignored working and seeking advice on their communication methods, yet communication is one of the central linchpins of a lasting marriage. “Long-term studies have found that one of the strongest predictors of success after five years of marriage is how a couple communicated before marriage.” Furthermore, what most couples lack in a successful marriage is not how hedonistic they live, but: "What matters in making a happy marriage," said George Levinger of the University of Massachusetts, "is not as much as you are compatible." they are, but how do you deal with the incompatibility''. Most of us get married without knowing the true purpose of marriage, its meaning and what it actually represents. Most people are also unaware of the four types of marriage (romantic, lifesaving, companionate, and traditional). Why is it important to be exposed to what we don't know about God's presence in marriage? It is essential to know the reality of marriage and the ups and downs it entails. This knowledge is profoundly essential to keeping married couples together while minimizing divorce. With proper understanding, you get proper expectations and mechanisms for dealing with torrents. Most of the purposes of marriage are covered in the following sections. Methodology This research is based on both social study (natural sciences) and the targeted study of various phenomena in a holistic manner, as the research questionnaire is objectively designed for answers (yes, no) and with the results subjected to serious scrutiny. Questionnaires are also objective in that they measure people's behaviors in their natural state (within various demographics... such as daily behaviors and activities). I incorporate observation to carefully observe people in order to generate sufficient data for research interpretation and analysis. Methodology section: The research is to analyze how poor communication causes many marriages to divorce and God's purpose on marriage. The underlying assumption is that most Christian marriages are not “pro-divorce” compared to civil marriages. This is due to the “good teachings of the Bible”; God plays a more important role in keeping couples together than in civil marriage where people depend on their own strength for the success of the marriage. We want to discover how proper communication and God's teachings are essential to the breakdown of marriages. Qualitative research design is essential not only to understand human behaviors, but also to deeply analyze their structural life. As argued by Van, “qualitative data focus their emphasis on people's life experiences placing most of the emphasis on events, processes, and structures of their lives (van Maanen, 1977). Withqualitative results, it is easier to convert stories into measurable data, which is our key resource for measuring research results. Only by using data (qualitative and quantitative) will we be able to capture the breadth and depth of marital dilemmas and divorce chaos. The greatest merit of the mixed method is the scope of “triangulation (incorporating, researchers, methods and sources) to the research phenomenon”. “Words, especially organized into episodes or stories, have a concrete, vivid and significant flavor that often proves to be much more convincing for the reader… (Miles & Huberman, 1994). With qualitative data, we are able to arrive at the fundamental meaning of marriage by analyzing its merits and demerits. Furthermore, qualitative research holistically exposes us to the natural process of things. For example, why we behave the way we naturally behave. "... be able to illuminate the ways in which people in particular contexts come to understand, account for, act on, and otherwise manage their daily activities (Miles & Huberman, 1994). Chosen Methodology Ethnographic research allows us to consider and represent actors as creators as well as executors of their own meanings. The very way they tell us what they do tells the researcher a lot about what is significant for and in the research .' (Stuart Hannabuss, “Being There: Ethnographic Research and Autobiography,” Library Management, Vol. 21 No. 2) The incorporation of qualitative ethnographic research has pacified our focus on the natural understanding of people in various marital contexts; designated demographic study of marriage. The ethnographic method also allows interviewers to participate in our research at ease in their own local environment, with the option to opt out of the interview if for any reason they feel violated due to the intensity of the confidential data. Marital interviews work wonders in this context by making everyone part of the ongoing interview process. This improves collaboration and understanding between both parties involved. Finally, the information collected is easier to analyze if you were part of the process of ongoing interview. This is because; the interviewee's perspective has been incorporated into the interview process and data collection. You can also reference the entire process with the collected videos, interview reports and recorded minutes which enrich the quality of the extracted data. Data AnalysisThere was no better method to incorporate into this analysis than what Miles analyzed in his study which involved: "-using fixed codes set to specific fields of observationUsing signs to reflect various marginal transactionsGrouping similarities together (phrases, patterns)And organize accurate data with reduction method” Symbols used, for example W for women and M for men in interview settings Sign languages, body movements, gestures and sighs are also studied for margins on intense codes .Intense codes help us organize neat and precise data, making it easier to eliminate ambiguities. With this in hand, what remains is to support our findings to materialize the research to verify its validity and integrity. Design I took my design idea from Wallerstein and Blakeslee, 1996 study of “Il Buon Matrimonio”. With this idea, I incorporated open-ended interview questions with a semi-structured design. This was incorporated with a questionnaire design that included non-restrictive questions (preferred rate ofChristian marriages compared to civil marriage); prefer 6 questions (Max.8); short and precise questions; mixed questions (open, initial and closed) and multiple choice questions. The questionnaire was sent to all participants within the research group. Selection method The initial goal was to randomly select 50 pairs, but this was not feasible due to search time. So, I filled out the online questionnaire; compile online essays, social media posts (Facebook, Snapchat, WhatsApp groups and phone contacts). The invitations sent with greeting cards and the people who responded are the ones selected for the interview. Here we have narrowed down the selected couples based on their marital experience, number of family members, years of marriage and religious beliefs. Each couple had to have been married for at least 5 years, have a family and be still married or divorced after that period. Couples who met the criteria and were also religious were given first choice. All previous interviews were scheduled by telephone. Interview Procedure The ground rule was established before any interview. Therefore, the interviews were designed to each last only 30 to 45 minutes. Part 1: Answer all questions related to the research. Part 2: Give people the option to opt out if they decide they no longer want to proceed for any reason. Part 3: Requesting consent for video and voice recordings as it concerns sensitive information about their marriage and sex life. “…The emphasis was on people's lives, experiences, and their concept of how their data relates to the world around them” (Van Manen, 1977). Part 4: Starting the interview and recording the interview report. “Qualitative” data ensured that the researcher could be both an active participant and a passive observer (Miles & Huberman, 1994). Participants For confidentiality reasons, I have changed the names as requested by the interviewees. Some of the information below is too sensitive and concerns the very real difficulties the couple faces on a daily basis. Joel and Keyla Cowan Joel and Keyla were married for 20 years before their divorce. They were also best friends in high school before confessing their vows to each other after graduation. For Joel, his life as a child was a total disaster. He was raised by a single mother due to family violence. He has never experienced the love of his fathers, something he still lacks. The fact that his father was an alcoholic caused many setbacks at home. Every day was hell after his father was drunk. “I don't remember the good days, but I definitely remember the bad ones. Frankly every day was a bad day. My father would use all the resources of the house just to have a drink. He spent most weekends drunk, even though he was at home, he was never sober. After their divorce, I grew up with a loving mother who instilled in me the essence of true love. She had little, but was very generous and forgiving. “Keyla, on the other hand, was raised by both parents. She was the beauty of the house and everything she wanted was given to her. She was their parents' source of joy. She was very close to both parents and spent her most of the time playing football with his father. After falling in love during the early days of high school, they knew everything about each other. They spent weekends together studying and fishing, which they really liked after 5 years of marriage began to notice changes in their marriage life. They both realized that they spent most of their time working, rather than together. They stopped playing football and fishing together and when they arrivedchildren, they were no longer who they once were. Their differences continued to widen over the years of their marriage. Although they spent most weekends singing in the choir, that too has changed. Joel had to stay outside playing soccer with his son Tony because weekends were the only free time for recreational activities. An intriguing fact was that they never stopped loving each other. Keyla spent most of her time at home, raising children and cooking. He loved keeping the house tidy. She loved to weave and grill and the rest of her free time was spent playing the piano and singing. After their 20th anniversary, Joel said he wanted out. Bothered by work and stressed by family demands, he realized he just needed some free time alone. There were no arguments or fights over the divorce, there was mutual consent that both parties agreed on. They still hope to get married again.Emily and GeorgeEmily and George met while working in the IT field. They were both programmers and enjoyed working together. Their first project was with IBM, automating CommVault software. They just celebrated their 18th anniversary. Couples are richly blessed with the gift of worship. They are leaders in the church and highly respected for their wealth of wisdom. Their main struggle was to be in harmony with their in-laws. Emily is very laid back and easy going, but is a planning guru when it comes to working with money. He is the financial manager of their home and approves every financial decision about the family. George on the other hand is the OCD of the house. His phone must be as he left it on the table. His shoes need to be brushed and his clothes ironed. They both agreed that money was never an issue because they were both programmers and had a stable income. George's parents expected him to take care of the household finances, but that wasn't the case. So any financial requests from his parents were handled by his wife Emily and they didn't like it. Emily's parents, having spent much of their lives on the farm, wanted their grandchildren to work with them on the farm as well. They wanted to train them and teach them the benefits of permanent employment, which both parents did not agree with. This is why couples have been constantly bombarded by in-law relationships. Being God-loving couples, everything was resolved in prayer. The couple spent most of their time on their knees praying. They believe in dedicating everything to God. Emily said, “Why do I have to stress about the things I can't change. It's easier for me to be on my knees praying and trusting that God will provide than I can imagine. Everything I prayed for I received and every day I am beyond blessed. Even if it gets stressful, I trust God with everything.”Mercy &TrapMercy and Trap have been married for 10 years and during this time; they physically fought each other 3 times. They have 4 children (Sam, Holly, Joan and Peter). Mercy is a stay-at-home mom and Trap is the DevOps guru. Money has never been their problem. For them, the main problem is communication problems and sports. Sam is a sports fanatic and when his team (Liverpool) plays at home he does nothing else. Everything in that football period is a “yes” as long as you leave him alone to his game. Although money was never an issue, Sam's spending was not wise. He is the one who takes risks, buys stocks and gambles. And since he is a bread winner, talking about his spending has been a thorn in their marriage. Mercy said that: “Sometimes I just want to choke him. If it weren't for God, I would just have itCRUSHED. His impulsive spending is killing me. We set the budget and before the end of the month it's like we haven't done anything. I felt very disrespected and without any say in the matter. I've felt so inferior and it's killing me. I have spent most of my time praying for myself and for us, but some days are harder than others.” For Trap, he was living the life of his dreams. He knows their problems, but at least he solves them the way he thinks. “I spent most of my time working and programming. I spent 12 hours a day coding and then I have to have a life. I have to get what my heart desires because I work so hard to get it. My family has enough money, a nice house in a good neighborhood and everything they want.” We can see the disconnection and communication problems, but we know how to fix it and keep their marriage safe and intact. For Trap, he is earning a lot for his family, while for Emily it is the love of Christ that keeps them together. Wilfred and JoanWilfred and Joan met at a movie theater in Tn, Johnson City. Joan just broke up and lost her boyfriend to her best friend. She was shaking, sad and lost. When Wilfred approached her and joked about asking her out on a date, she said yes without thinking. Roy admitted that he was just joking, but that simple joke, after 2 years, gave him a beautiful wonderful wife. They have been married for 4 years and have 3 children. Their main problems concerned their sick children. They battled sickle cell anemia which made their lives truly unbearable. They went through every source of prayer, devotion and meditation. They also attended various counseling on how to keep their family together. Joan was the strongest and most faithful. He gave everything to God and spent all his time reading the Bible and praying for the children. Some days are better than others, but expressing your true feelings has been very difficult. Mo and MessyMo admitted to being married for sex. At first he did not value marriage and did not expect to stay married for more than 2 years. For him, marrying Messy was a family ritual. He wanted to please his parents who constantly nagged him to get married, but that was not his true desire. As for Messy, she knew very well at the time of their marriage that Mo didn't love her, and it was all good, because she loved him. So it was a one-sided love. Messy: “I knew he would eventually love me manfully after he had kids. We grew up together, went to the same high school and the same university. He was my first crush and I loved him so much. Marrying him was everything to me. It was a dream come true. And because I knew the pressure he was under to get married, this was my tool and my opportunity and I would have done the same thing if given the same opportunity.” Messy believes that people get married for various reasons and for her it was love and there is nothing better than that. The messy strength of being married was effective communication. He knows when to speak and when to remain silent. He knows when Mo is angry and needs quiet time, and more than anything, he knows what to say to get him back on his feet. We can say that it was the strength of the family. Job and Christy After just 3 years of marriage, Job and Christy filed for divorce. For Job, this is something he saw coming long before it became reality. Job: “I met my wife Christy at a church meeting, she was gorgeous and had an insanely lovely expression. It was love at first sight. We got married six months after meeting and since we met at a church event, it was phenomenal. I realizeafter our two year anniversary Christy stopped taking care of herself. He stopped working out, walking or participating in any exercise we did. He has started to gain weight and every time I try he notices it; she threw a punch and she wasn't happy. She said I called her "fat" and would go on and on. For me she because totally someone I don't know. Over time, my sex life also changed. I was no longer attracted to her. I'd rather do something else to spend time with her, and then we'd drift apart. When I knew it was over, it was when I was invited for an event with my friends and I couldn't take her with me. That's when I was shocked at how much I had changed. Since we couldn't talk about her weight gain without arguing, I just said enough." Christy was shocked by the divorce, she still has trouble talking about it or accepting it. For her, yes, she gained some weight, and not she was more like she used to be, but she also had some serious health issues that pushed her to that edge. On their second anniversary she had a miscarriage and almost lost her life. With all the emotions and depression that came with it 'accident, it wasn't easy for her to get back to normal. She needed time to heal and get back to normal, which Job couldn't do. Once again it was about miscommunication and misunderstanding reality that they are divorced and that it's his fault."Research DesignWe incorporated the cross-sectional design into this section, even though the longitudinal design would have been a better choice. The cross-section fits well because of the research time and the fact that it is less expensive. We had limited options because the interviewers were willing to meet once for the interview. Summary/Conclusion/Recommendations Summary This research sought to answer why proper communication is essential in all marriages and God's purpose for married couples. The interview showed the vivid reality, difficulties and chaos that couples face while married. He also showed the purpose of the Christian faith in marriage and what constitutes it. We thoroughly analyzed and compared the interviews with the research data and, frankly, the results were intriguing. All research variables were selected from the couples' interviews and the role they assigned to this research. WorkWork was the main issue that most couples struggled with. Work stress has prevented many couples from having vivid communication. Some work schedules were not family-friendly, making it difficult for couples to transition well into being the parents and couples they were meant to be. Furthermore, in cases where men were the only bread earners, women felt very disrespected and naive, especially when their voice was taken for granted. Communication Communication was one of the most frequently referenced attributes. Many couples believed that with proper communication they would still be married or be in much better shape. Although the communication style is different, understanding your partner was essential. Understanding their language, body signs, gestures and sighs was essential to a successful marriage. Each couple had their own drawbacks, but with proper communication they also found better solutions.Religious and spiritualityThis was the most contradictory and sensitive topic. Overall, most couples believed in God alone to stay married. The research also supported that being part of a community of believers helped the couple copemarital disorders and misunderstandings. The support system offered by most churches helps save many couples from divorce. Additionally, understanding why God created marriage and its basic requirements helps most couples give up their marital expectations, which has lowered the divorce rate. Marriage crisis and divorce rateMany couples have had ups and downs, it was normal in every marriage, the difference was the action they took. Marriage success was not based on staying married or living hedonistically, but on the fundamental meaning of marriage. The success was based on how the couple worked together to resolve their conflicts and misunderstandings. The contemptuous crisis was a good test not only of faith but also of character and resistance. As James observed: “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance do its work, that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing” (James 1:2-4). Limitation of the researchThe biggest limitation was time. There wasn't enough time to fully study couples and see their behaviors over a period of time. Given the number of workers, it was not easy to schedule the interviews due to time constraints. Additionally, this research touches on sensitive information, and many couples did not want their information made public. This also prevented us from extracting more sensitive information, such as the practical sex lives of various couples. Other times it was not easy to decode what the couples said, making it more difficult to collect the necessary data. The use of archived data with various registered marriage theories also altered the quality of the research perception. Hence, the data was mixed (old archival data and interview data). Future Study Marriage is a complex topic that requires a lot of time for data collection. In the future, it will be very useful to spend more time on this research. Students will be able to collect more data, conduct more interviews, and delve deeper into their research studies. Furthermore, this research needs to have more structural interview settings that incorporate the professionalism currently missing. I would also encourage myself and others to conduct interviews in friendlier settings. Conclusion The variables I used in this study imply: “'God/faith', 'good'; it happened." I intend to pursue this research beyond this course. I want to fully understand the essence of marriage and the role God plays in it. With this knowledge, I hope to find a better solution for the majority of families and help minimize the divorce rate in our society. We need to know the true energy, and in most cases, we are fighting the wrong battle. The Bible emphasizes the need to fight the good fight. “Fight the real enemy who comes only to steal, kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full" (John 10:10). Keep in mind: This is just an example. Get a custom paper from our expert writers now. Get a custom essay As a researcher, my understanding of family values ​​is indispensable. I must remain humble and continue my education on the daily struggles that marriages pose to us. Reference page A. (2013). Retrieved February 24, 2018, from http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/1476750313482214Carr, L.T. (1994)..